Out with 2009 and in with 2010

Well, 2009 was both a good and a bad year. Good in that we had a new granddaughter born in November – and she is growing like crazy and smiling and laughing now. She brings a smile to all 5 grandparent’s faces when they see her and hold her. Good in that Brian got work till mid January, 2010 and saved us from the poor-house. Brooke and Ryan both turned 2 this year. Hard to believe!

We had a small and quiet Christmas this year – only 13 and that included 2 kids. My three kids were here as well as some friends we have had before and a new set. Brian’s son, CW and his wife Leina and their two girls, Brooke and Ayla came over in the afternoon to exchange gifts and visit – was great to have the little girls here! And then went to Matt & Britt’s for brunch on Boxing Day and it tasted very yummy indeed – but food made by others usually does! But this really was good!

Bad in the fact that the cancer doesn’t quite know what to do. With each round, the first three treatments go great and often in the CT scan show shrinkage, but for some reason the last three treatments do no fair as well.

I saw Dr. Pansegrau this morning to get my results of the CT scan taken on the 21^st of December. My last chemo was on December 3^rd. Brian actually asked me last night what I felt the outcome would be today – and I hate being right when it comes to my cancer. I said I thought there was some growth in the tumours. He thought maybe they had just stayed as they were. Well, guess we were both right, as there was growth in some tumours – 8mm to 15mm, 5mm to 9mm and I can’t remember the sizes of the others that grew. For the most part, they had just stayed the same. Not really what we wanted but at least they all hadn’t grown. Told Dr. P that I had been very tired of late, not wanting to eat – feel hungry but once I start after three or four mouthfuls I am full. I have been dropping weight and this was noted by him as well – he said I was this weight in July, but I don’t remember looking like I do now back then. I am waiting for a call for an ultrasound of the liver – they want to keep checking on that to make sure the cancer hadn’t spread.

He talked about two different therapies – one hormonal and the other chemotherapy. I mentioned that each time Iam on hormonal, it does not work and he agreed. So, I am now starting the 4^th round of chemo – this one totally different from all of the rest. This one is an oral chemotherapy called Capecitabine, that I take twice daily – albeit each time I take the meds – I take 4 pills – so eight a day. 112 for a week and 224 for two weeks. And then a week off and two on and one off. They only give you one treatment at a time and that is fine by me – the blister packs are huge.

There are some doozy side effects – some of which I have already had and well, the others are brand new. Heart problems is a side effect and with me having the left bundle branch block and a rapid heart rate, will have to watch out for any signs of heart issues – and the nurses and pharmacist have all said, if it is going to happen, it is normally in the first 24 to 72 hours and if it does, call the nursing hot line or get to emergency. Risk of infection of course is always in the background; just have to keep an eye on my temperature which I have been the past few days. Increased risk of bleeding and bruising. I just have to remember, no cutting myself!!! Nausea and vomiting – I have meds for those. Hair loss is very rare – wahooooo – though possibly thinning. Mouth sores are a big time problem, not just. The two worst side effects are hand-foot skin reaction and diarrhea – the later needs no explanation! The skin reaction does not sound at all fun. Your palms of your hands and soles of your feet can tingle, become red, numb, painful or swollen. Skin can become extremely dry, itchy and fall off in patches or come off in sheets – yech! I need to get some good lanolin-containing cream and also some Vitamin B6 (50-150mg) per day. Brian has said not hot tub for me…. Laughing of course! And my hot tubbing could be limited if the skin reacts like they have said – I use if to relieve the pain and soreness of my joints – so rather than being in 15 or 20 minutes, could be 5 to 10 minutes.

I go for lab work on Jan 18 at 2pm and then see Dr. P at 3:40pm, to see how the numbers are and how I am reacting. Ohhh speaking of numbers!!! Neuts are 3.17, Whites are 1.75 and hemoglobin is 114 – which have come down since the last blood work – it was 124 on Dec 3. But all in all, great numbers. I don’t have all the rest of the numbers as the lab was taking so long in getting them to the pharmacy that the pharmacist just told me to go home with the meds and if there was anything strange about them, she would call me. She just called to let me know they had been found!

So that is all for 2009!

To everyone – may you have a Happy and Healthy 2010 and have lots of fun on New Year’s Eve – but do drive safe, want to see you next year!

Cheers

Roni & Brian

Last chemo of round 3 and Merry Christmas!

Hi everyone

Well, had my last chemo of round #3 yesterday. I thought it was chemo #20 but I kind of forgot how to add! It was actually round #24 - no wonder I am tired!!!

Sandy came with me again and as usual, we have a lot of fun! Did the lab work and then headed to Timmy's for a cuppa hot chocolate - and it was yummy! Sat and talked for a while and then headed to her car to get my quilt bag and my box of ornaments for the nurses and went into the cancer clinic! I ran into Whitney in the waiting area, so she got her ornament first! I got Olivia as my nurse, and of course, I have never had her, and didn't have an ornament for her (but will on the 21st). She hooked me up right away and got the premeds into my system and then as soon as that was done (20 minutes) she hooked up the chemo drug. Now during all of this, all the other nurses are coming to get their ornaments and they all loved them. 14 ornaments for 13 nurses and 1 wonderful volunteer. Dr. P's will have to wait till the 21st as he was on holidays! I go in for a CT scan on Dec 21st and then see Dr. P on the 29th. Kinda hard having to wait for the results over Christmas, but what can you do, right! Once we get the results, then shall see what will happen next. I am hoping for a month or two off from the chemo just to give the body a time to recoup. And after the chemo, Sandy and I went for lunch at one of the local pubs by my house and I had the best hamburger....LOL... it just tasted so good and nothing fancy, just a Samz burger!

The holiday season has begun! The house is all decorated for Christmas - Meghan and Patrick helped me get the tree up and decorated on Tuesday. Doesn't look too bad - if I do say so myself! Got my Christmas cards done - to mail them tomorrow! Luncheons and dinners are coming up over the next few weeks. And then Christmas dinner! That will be a lot of fun - with family and friends - the more the merrier!

On the local news last night, there was a feature on a young cancer patient. I had the opportunity to be her room mate when I was in the hospital the first time. She is an amazing 18 year old (almost 19 I believe) and when we were in the hospital together we talked and laughed - took turns seeing what we had as a meal - taking the lid off and giving it a yay or nay. More nays than yays!!! There was an article on her in the Vancouver Sun today and she will be co-hosting on the news on one of the radio stations tonight - I will listen to it! Like me, her cancer has spread into her lungs. I love her attitude - a quote from the paper - "Eventually I will pass away.....but just because I'm sick doesn't mean anything else has to change. I am just a regular person." We have become Facebook friends, so will keep up with her on there, she is a busy young lady!

My son Patrick was accepted into the military and will be joining the Navy. He will do his basic in Quebec (cold) and he should be gone by the end of January. Once his basic is done, takes 4 months I believe, he will be posted in Esquimalt (outside of Victoria) and that made me very happy to hear. He has some of his aunts and uncles in Victoria, so that will be nice for him and for them as well. Gives me an excuse to visit the island a little more!

Well, that is it for now...... have a very Merry Christmas everyone and will have a new blog on the 29th of December!

Love and hugs to all!

Roni

PS - pictures to follow - having problems uploading them to here! May not get pictures here , have been trying to load them since Friday and no luck at all.

#19 and more

Hello everyone!

A few things to report but nothing really exciting - oh yeah, just my birthday!

Tuesday was my birthday and a rather busy day at that! My gf Sandy came over for a glass of wine some wonderful cheeses. And as usual, great conversation. When I was on Facebook, I was blown away and humbled by the number of wonderful birthday wishes I had from around the world! It was great. Then Brian and I headed out for dinner to one of our fav little hang-outs, The Saint St. Grill in Port Moody. Unfortunately our favourite host, Jay was off that night, so we had Pavlina instead. And as usual - the food was great and we came away stuffed and contented.

I decided to get brave and try some acupuncture to help with the pain in my arms and such. Mila came over on Wednesday morning - and I was a little apprehensive to say the least. But after she straightened my back and neck it was ok. She injected 13 little needles into me - one between the eyes - this one is hard not to laugh at! You can see it all the time and it wobbles. One on each foot, two by each knee and three on each arm. She let them stay in for about 40 minutes and took them out. She also placed some magnets in key points - pain, relaxation and nausea. So far pain free - the neuropathy is still there but nearly as bad. The arms haven't fallen asleep at all since Wed and I love it!

Then went to see the oncologist. My regular doctor was away so met with Dr. Johal - very young and reserved -as one of the nurses said, "he is still shiny". He didn't seem to mind I had tried the acupuncture and wasn't concerned on my weight loss. Though Lesley, who took my weight and such was a little concerned - I had lost 10 lbs since seeing the oncologist the last time. No complaints from me, but guess they will keep a check on that. He mentioned that maybe there would be a bit of a break from chemo at the end of this round - which is fine with me, 16 months of steady chemo is hard on a body believe you me. But will all depend on the CT scan and what Dr. P has to say when I see him Dec 29.

Lisa and Shelley

Had chemo this morning - and Jaimie came with me. He has been a friend since we were in high school - so long time friend. We got to the chemo waiting area a little early - about 1/2 hour and Phil came out and go this patient and said hi to me and then came out again when it was now past my time to have been in the chemo lab. He asked why I was there and still waiting. Said I was there for 11:15 chemo - and he said that is not a normal time but he would check for me. Came back out and said Shelley would be my

Jaimie

nurse today and she was running a wee bit behind. Shortly thereafter, I was in Pod 4. She was busy so let her finish with her other patients and then she asked how I was doing. She was a little concerned on the acupuncture but mainly worried about infection. No problems with that. My numbers were fantastic - haemoglobin was 126, neuts were 2.15 and platelets were 2.16 so all in all pretty damn good. For a lot of cancer patients these can be considered low counts, but for me they are right where I want them. For the pre-meds going, which took about 15 minutes and then the 30 minute wait to get it all into my system and then 30 minutes for the chemo to go through and we were outta there. Will be back next Thursday for #20 and my last of this round and maybe for a few months!!! And for the last half of my chemo, I had Lisa Marie for my nurse - I met her the first time I was in the hospital and she was a student nurse!!!

Friday was my birthday lunch over at Shannon's - Meghan and her two little ones were there. And got to meet Marla, the newest puppy in the family. She is a cutie - a little crazy, but she is 3 months old. Tucker is great with her. And Ryan, just wasn't sure at time about her - same size and craziness! Chasing each other - and Marla in into kisses. The lunch was wonderful and very tasty - I even got a birthday cake - it was yummy.

Well, that has been it for this week. Will update again next week on my last chemo. Twenty chemos in 16 months is a lot and will be nice to maybe get a bit of a break and let the body heal on its own for a while. And get rid of some of the toxic chemicals which are in my body now.

All for now

Roni

What a difference a year makes

Got another fill up!

Hi there

Well, went yesterday for my usual fill-up!

Ok, I went for another transfusion! This was number 3 and then 2nd in 6 weeks. Had a wee bit more fun in the room this time, though still the youngest one there!!! Brought water and snacks with me this time which did help pass some of the time away. And had two different books - though can't remember what I read! Lot of good that does, huh. So will have to go back and re-read. I was in bed by 9 and asleep very quickly. The poor heart didn't know what to do with those extra two pints of blood - so figured it was time to shut the body down and rest and I did!

Next chemo is on the 26th so nothing to report till then - hopefully.

Madelynn is doing well - though haven't seen her since Monday.....LOL... will have to see if the family will come over for a visit on the weekend - like Sunday. Subtle aren't I!

I have put my name in for some volunteer work and have been picked for three different events. One will be a lot of fun - working for the Arts Club Theatre during the Olympics on Granville Island. Working the green room - which will be a lot of fun for sure! As well as a greeter/rover. Two others haven't really heard what I will be doing, but should be getting a phone call soon.

Well that is about all for now.

Call me, write me, email me, poke me........ I am bored people.... never hear from anyone.... seems like all my friends have gone poof. Though my FB friends seem to be around!!

Roni

Baby Days and Chemo!

Hi Everyone

Everything should be in pink - we have a brand new granddaughter!!!

Madelynn Sierra arrived at 11:51 on November 4 at Surrey Memorial Hospital. She weighed 9lbs 1oz - which may seem large but, remember, Ryan was 13lb 7oz! She was 21 inches long (we had that corrected - proof was in the measuring tape!!). Had a beautiful head of hair and lovely dark blue eyes at this point. Mommy, Daddy and Big Brother are all doing well and smiling from ear to ear!!! I am babysitting Ryan till Meghan comes home on Saturday - will need Sunday to recoup!!!

I have been up to the hospital a few times - and Meghan is making a great recovery - much better compared to the first one. Ryan loves his little sister as you can see in this one picture - he was checking out her fingers.

Had chemo #18 today. Two more to go! My neuts and white counts were great - wahooo..... ok so they were low but good for me..... neuts were 2.1 and whites were 3.5!! But my haemoglobins were low - 81, Darlene called Gary and he has now put in for another blood transfusion - yippeee - not. That will be three since May. Mila came with me this time. We got talking about acupuncture - and she does this as part of her clinic. Darlene says they have had some good results with it for neuropathy - so I am going to bite the bullet and let Mila stick pins in me.... and hopefully it will help - I have nothing to lose for sure. I also got a bunch of tapes, cds and books from the cancer library yesterday when I was there... Will try out the first cd tonight - need some mental downtime. Next chemo is Nov 25 and then Dec 3. CT scan booked for Dec 31 - may try and get it moved up a wee bit - and will see the doc the week following the CT scan to get the results.

Guess that is it for a while... will update if anything exciting happens... and exciting in a good way.. ..no hospital stays allowed...LOL

With Darlene

This is Trudy, one of the cancer volunteers - she is a sweetie

Lots of info and it is all good!

Hello from soggy PoCo

This one may get a tad long, it is a couple of weeks worth! Has been a while hasn't it!

Last week was Brian's birthday, so we went to the Saint St. Grill for his dinner - we both love the place, good food, atmosphere and service. And as usual we had a wonderful time!





Have had the usual side effects from chemo since the last treatment! But that is ok, they aren't strange ones!! The worst one is the fatigue - it gets worse with each treatment. And I went and got my H1N1 flu shot on Monday and today my arm is almost back to normal!!


Just a cutie of Ryan








Met with a counsellor at the Vancouver Clinic - man that building is morbid and depressing! It is an old building - but you can see feel the difference between it and the one that I go to!! I don't have to go back and see her till January which is great. The one thing I don't understand though, they have this lovely roof-top garden area - lots of seating, plants and trees. Now remember, this is the Cancer Agency. They have a closed off garden area - for smoking!!! In a building that has no smoking signs all over the place!!! Will have to ask about that one - makes no sense to me!

Got some great books, dvd's and cd's from the FVCC and the cd's are meditation type and they are great. So they will have to go back next week.

Went to a women's focus group and found a group I could really belong to. Women living with metastatic cancers. There were five of us the last time - which is much smaller than normal. They are a great group. They even have their own book - great reading. I was going to go this coming Wednesday but will be unable to make it. More about the reasoning a little later.

Saw Dr. P on Tuesday. Tumour markers are down about 100 points - they are down to 213. Wahooo!! Liver ultrasound looks good, still has the 6mm spot on the lower left lobe and another spot on the left kidney. The heart ultrasound looks good for me, it is pumping a little harder than it would for regular person, but hey, it is pumping and that is what counts!!! He is cutting me off the Carboplatin - it has run its course for me. The neuropathy is getting worse in my hands and arms - and that is not fun at all. None so far in my feet and I am very glad about that! So that will make the chemo sessions shorter. He is booking another CT scan after the 6th set of treatments. He is not sure if he will put me back to the two week break or keep me at the three week break. Guess will find out next Thursday when I go for chemo. Once I have the next chemo, then it will be decided what course of action will be taken. What type of chemo - there are still lots of options and cocktails out there or take a break from chemo and then start again - it is all a wait and see what happens!!


Tuesday also included a visit to Meghan's OBGYN - her last one before the arrival of Madelynn. He had scheduled her c-section for Monday Nov 2nd at 11am. That got changed today - now it is on Wednesday Nov 4 at 9:30. The Anaesthesiologists are on strike! Hadn't heard about that. Dr. Ho figures the baby will weigh in between 7 1/2 to 8 1/2 lbs. So I am in the running for the weight pool!!! Megz will be so glad to get this baby out!!!!

After the doc appointments, we went off to the pumpkin patch! We had a lot of fun and so did Ryan - walking through the fields after the hay ride down to them! Muddy but not so muddy you got stuck!! Ryan found one large pumpkin and then decided it wasn't the right one..... and then Gammie found one and he said it was the right one..... it had to weigh 30+ pounds..... try carrying that round thing - I rolled it part of the way! Then he found a nice little one that he could carry and that would be his. And I got a wee one as well. When I paid, was told we could pick a mini pumpkin or gourd as well - so we got 6 pumpkins and three hayrides for $12... not bad, huh!














Chemo day! Dick took me today - a friend from way, way back - met him in 1976. We lost contact as you do with so many friends, moving around and different marriages etc. But we have reconnected and he offered to take me today. Several of the nurses came and chatted with us in the waiting room - Trace, Lesley and waved to three or four of them. Then Darlene called my name. First time I have had her but seen her lots and she was there when I had the first allergic reaction in round 1. Also had a chemo nurse in training, Michelle. They both asked lots of questions. My hemoglobin numbers are starting to drop again. Michelle called Dr. P to let him know in case he wanted to book a transfusion. He let me go with this one but have a feeling another transfusion is coming my way. My neuts were good 1.5 which is still very low, but better than before - remember, they were 0.03. Got the premeds into me and they are making me more drowsy than normal - mouth and brain don't always communicate and I feel like I am slurring my words. It was an uneventful chemo session - we love those ones! Though over in Pod 2, things were a bit more exciting as someone had an allergic reaction to their drugs! My fellow patient Marilynn was there in the same pod as me and right beside me, so that made it a lot of fun!! Poor gal had to be there for 7 hours - yech!!Meghand and Ryan stopped by for a mini visit - I had forgotten my camera, so she came with hers - she had to come to the hospital anyways to get blood work done. The nurses and patients loved Ryan.


Tomorrow, I go to the FVCC for a stress relaxation series - so that should be good - medication, relaxation and putting them all together. Will let you know how that turns out.


Next chemo is Nov 5 and Mila is coming with me - now that will be an interesting session for those of you who know her! I will have her just meet me at the clinic as I will have Meghan's vehicle - I am babsitting Ryan while she is in the hospital.

I know it may seem like harping, but I do not hear from anyone other than maybe 1 or 2 that call me on a regular basis. I miss getting the phone calls. Or if you are far away - email. The house gets lonely when you are by yourself. Jokes are good, but would like to hear how you are doing. Would love a visit if you are this way during the week - I know it is hard as most of you are working. The phone will go days and not ring - have to pick it up to see if it is still working!!! So, please give me a call - the excuse I don't know what to say, doesn't cut it anymore... I have cancer, I am dealing with it! Let me know how your kids are, the dog, fish, cat, husband, exhusband, weather and work are doing! Even how your next door neighbours gout is doing!!! And also, put something on the blog to let me know you read it - same thing, doesn't have to be about me - your garden, weather etc..... And thank you to Lois for calling last night - from Trail - we had a lovely chat for over an hour!

Hugz
Roni

Happy Thanksgiving!

It is turkey time! Well, it was for us last night! What a wonderful even we had. Hope that everyone had enough to eat and drink!

We had 16 for dinner - myself and Brian, Rick and Chantal, Shannon & Dwayne, Meghan, Corey & Ryan, Lindsay, Ken, Sarah, Tomer & Carla and Matt & Britt. Lots of wonderful wines - thank you Rick, Shannon, Tomer and Sarah! And the best company! Lots of laughter for sure.

And Shannon made her baked brie - it is always so yummy. And Britt brought hers as well with peppered jellies!

We let Rick carve the turkey and Dwayne carved the ham! They both did a great job and not much turkey left - but enough for me to have a sandwich shortly!

We were all taking bets as to how much Meghan and Corey's baby will weigh - she is coming any day now, we all can sense it! And we can't wait! Want to meet this little girl!

Many dishwasher loads later and the last guests left - midnight! Ryan woke up just as Mommy picked him up from the bed and he wanted oranges. So a container went home with him for him to have today! Then we sat down with a glass of wine and relaxed. Then I went to bed and had a long sleep!

Then today, got a wonderful call from a very dear friend in Romania - Tiberius - and he played a beautiful piece of music which he composed for the piano, for me over the phone. It was an amazing feeling and experience. Brought tears to my eyes, but in a good way. Can't wait to see him again the next time he visits - we all miss him terribly.

Now the table is back to normal, the dishes are all done (5 loads) and put away. Hard to tell we had a houseful of family last night - though the fridge gives that away! The sun is shining and it is such a beautiful day!

Hope everyone has a wonderful Thanksgiving this weekend and that each of everyone of us has something to be grateful for. Life, love and happiness pretty much sums it up for me!

Love to you all

Roni

Fall is Approaching

Hello everyone,

Well, this week was rather quiet compared to last week!

Though, did have a wonderful Saturday afternoon spent with Shannon. We went to The Teahouse in Stanley Park - what a view from there - stunning. For those of you not from here, Stanley Park is our jewel in the middle of the busy city of

Shannon and I in one of the beautiful rooms at the Teahouse

Vancouver. Over 400 hectares (1,000 acres) of hemlock, cedar and maple trees (though we lost almost 10,000 in a terrible windstorm a few years back). It is home to the Vancouver Aquarium - set within the trees and the water. It also includes Lost Lagoon, Siwash Rock, Nine O'Clock Gun, Beaver Lake and the beautiful, almost 9km Seawall. But I must get back to what I was saying. We had a great lunch, they don't know how to do bad food there! Think we were there over three hours - good company, conversation, food and wine! And driving through the park, seeing the leaves as they are starting to change into their beautiful autumn colours.

How could I forget Monday!!! Went to the Vancouver Aquarium (also in Stanley Park) with Ryan and Meghan. Spent most of it outside watching the 4 Beluga whales - Aurora, Qila, Ticqa and No Name (she is only a few months old - and waiting for the school

Ryan sitting in amazement of the whales

kids to give her a name as has been done in the past). Ryan loves them and could sit and watch them for hours. He knows all of their names - better than Mommy and Gammie (we get Aurora and Qila mixed up - Aurora is Qilas Mom and is also the new calf's Mom). Stood and watch inside at the sharks and Schoona the huge sea turtle - love to watch the eyes of young ones as they watch this display. And with all of the years I have gone to the Aquarium, finally took a picture of the sculpture at the front by the late Haida Indian artist Bill Reid.

Bill Reid's Stunning Art Work

Baby playing with her rubber float

And today was chemo day! Went with Meghan - and this could be her last trip for a while as she is ready to have this baby any day now! Got to the Ambulatory Day Care to check in and of course my appointment is not there and this is not their fault - they can only do what they are given. But the staff got it all figured out and we were on our way to Medical Day Care for my blood work. This got a wee bit complicated as they didn't know what samples to be drawing for, so she figured, what the heck, will do them all - and if the requisition came in time, she could throw out what was not needed. Only one had to go, the tumour marker. Then time for a bit of lunch and off to chemo.

Meghan and I at the end of chemo

Had Trish again today, and always fun to have her, though seems like forever that I have had her as my nurse. She had everything set and ready to go when I sat down. First the anti-allergy meds and then the Gemcitabine. And it all went nice and smoothly! She commented that in the five years she has been at the Fraser Valley Centre, she has never seen the allergic reaction I had twice with this drug. It was a good chuckle for sure - though the new patient who is on the same set of drugs as I started on, didn't seem to think so!

That is about it! We are having a family Thanksgiving dinner on Saturday. Should be a lot of fun, and will start preps tomorrow - get the pies out of the way as well as two other dishes which can be done early. Set the table and then Saturday, just cook the turkey and the ham and try to relax a bit! Again, it will be family and friends and of course wine!

Happy Thanksgiving to all my Canadian friends!!!

Roni

A Week of Fun & Appointments

Hi everyone

Well, this will be a long one, as it is a weeks worth of information and pictures!!

Last Thursday, my girlfriend Sandy and I drove out to Fort Langley to wander around - we had been trying to do this for about 6 months! We found a perfect parking spot in the shade and then began our attempt to find just the right place to go for lunch! The first store we looked into was a candle store - it was great - Old Candle Factory Ltd. I bought a couple of pairs of tapers that looks very interesting. And you can make your own candles there. So, we thought it might be interesting to get some of the gals that we go out for dinner with there and make some candles and then go out for lunch. And I am thinking about getting my girls and going there and doing the same. We wandered up and down Glover Road to see what was interesting for lunch. There were several and one that we thought would be fun didn't open till 4:30 - so you know what that means - we have to go back. But we found one that was so cute - the house was built as a family home in 1923. It is called Beatniks Bistro! They had more seating on the deck compared to inside. We sat on the deck and enjoyed a wonderful lunch and some wine of course. And I will go back for sure, good food, wine, prices and staff! We then wandered around and just snooped in stores to see what was there. But we had to go into Roxanne's Hats as I needed to find a red hat - will explain that one in another blog!!! We were allowed to take only one picture in there - fear of us taking pictures and then designing our own - have you seen my craft work!!! But I did manage to find one I liked - even if "some" people laugh at it. We did manage to find a funky 50's diner up the street and had to go in for some ice cream! They even had the little gizmos at each table with pages of songs in them to play - and we did! But realized that we knew almost every single song and the words that went with the song!!!

Combined lunches - Sandy had a wonderful salad & I had the ussels in a creamy white

sauce

Friday - what a blast - Meghan, Ryan, Patrick and I went to the Reiffel Bird Sancturay in Ladner - we has so much fun. Ryan did too - feeding the ducks and talking to them as well. We had a goose follow us for about half the trail - he walked right up by Meghan and if he decided to nibble on food, he would run to catch up with us. I think he thought Ryan was another goose, they were about the same height!!! Not sure who was more tired, us or Ryan!!! He eventually fell asleep in the van on the long ride home - traffic was a mess!

Ok, that was a good day - now for the weekend!

On Sunday, we had a surprise baby shower for Meghan. We had a lot of fun - about 25 friends and family were there. And "Madelynn" sure got a lot of very nice things - lots of pretty pink outfits. Meghan and Corey won't have to do laundry for a while! It was great to see old neighbours, new neighbours, and freinds and family from both sides. And lots of good food too - especially the Guacamole made by Dwayne - mmmmm was so good! And the beautiful cake made by Kim H for Meghan - looked so cute and tasted very good. There were 4 little ones - Linnea 5, Sophie 2, Ryan 2 and Alexus 13 months. They all played so well together and later Alexus and Ryan were an item - holding hands (she started it) and hugging - so very cute. We used a bit of a mean ruse to get Meghan here, but all in all she was ok with it - once her blood pressure went back down and she gave the culprits the evil eye!!! The young guys (Dwayne, Corey and Patrick) did a great job of getting all the tables and chairs from the deck to the lawn and then brought them all back up again. Decorating team of Tamara, Pat and Lindsay did an awesome job of putting up the balloons and streamers. And then the phone call for Meghan from Maui - her Dad and Chantal are there and unfortunately missed the shower, but they called during it and it sure brought a smile to Meghan's face. A good time was had by all - nice to have gatherings like this - and especially when you can still do it outside at the end of September!

On Monday, Meghan and I went to the cancer clinic for the Stress Reduction Series put on by the CCS. We got there for 1:30.... knocked on the door several times. No one was answering the door. Went to the receptionist and asked and she wasn't sure what was going on. Then read the sign and got the extention of the gal who had called me. She said it had been cancelled due to the instructor being sick. She said she had left a message for me at home - well I was at home at 11 and she didn't call the land line! She had called the cell which was off (which it is when I am home!). So, we went shopping instead!!! I had told her and Corey that Brian and I would by the play pen or play yards are they are called now! So we went to Wal-Mart - and there was one that had everything she needed and at a really good price. It came home with us - and Meghan being Meghan - put it together immediately!! And put all of the stuff she got from the shower into it till she is able to put them in the baby room once Ryan moves out!

Tuesday - visit with Dr. P - to get the results of the CT scan and to just talk about the current treatment. Some of the larger tumours have shrunk - wahooo and that is a promising feeling. Though will still hold off till the next CT to get really excited. I had several questions for him - why my tumour markers have gone up so high - they were 374. He said that they do go up and down - depending on how the chemo is going, so nothing to really worry about. I was happy to see that my weight had gone down a kilo from the last visit - every woman's dream!!! He listened to my heart and lungs and said they sounded good. He is a little concerned over me being winded so easily - so along with the liver ultrasound he is going to book, he is also booking a heart ultrasound. Hopefully these will get done before I see him again. He also said depending as to what happens on Thursday, he may space out the weeks between treatments - say 4 or5 weeks between in order to give my body time to recoup and get the numbers up a little higher. Hopefully Thursday will be a good day and have great numbers!!!

Then it was time to go to Meghan's appointment with her OBGYN - a very nice doctor. She is doing well - even if Madelynn is growing like a sprout. Dr. Ho said that it would be fine for her to have the baby at any time and Meghan was just fine with that. So lots of walking for her the next while.....LOL! Let's get this baby here - we all want to meet her. Afterwards, went to Sears to check out strollers. Holy crap some of them are so damned expensive - over $500 for some. It is a stroller already! But she found one on sale and then got an additional 10% off, so brought the price down considerably. And as per usual, she put it all together last night!

Thursday - chemo day! Shannon came with me this time - now for those of you who know Shannon, she is not a friend of needles or blood - so when they accessed the port and such - she looked the other way - same as in chemo when they checked the blood flow - she looked the other way! Phil was my nurse today and I got to take a picture of him. My numbers were awesome! Ok, some were still low, but better then what they have been for a long time. Maybe there is hope yet!!! White count was 4.3, Red count 2.85, HB was 98 (down 1 from last time) and Neutrophilis 1.9 - way up from the last time! Not sure what the tumour markers were, didn't get that sheet. It went along smoothly which is so nice for a change!! Have some questions to call into the office about tomorrow - wrong times for blood work and not sure why I am being sent to another doctor. And also to check as to why not the heart ultrasound - sending me for and ECG and I phoned and checked with Meghan to see if she had heard the same thing as me - ultrasound - and the woman said it back to me to try and get them on the same day. Possibly they are doing the ultrasound and the ECG. Booked into November now - holy crap! Ok - got the dates and doctors straightened around. Have the Echocardiogram done on the 22nd - good, one down and one to go. Got Dr. P booked for Oct 27 and not the other doctor the unit clerk booked me with. Cher will call me with the date of the liver ultrasound and she is hoping to try and book it for the same day as the heart ultrasound, wishful thinking. And got the blood work back to the same day as chemo. Whew!

That is all for now.... lots to absorb, I know.

Hugz to everyone. Call me or email me or comment here! Gets very boring when I hear from no one - ok, there are one or two who contact me - that is it! I love hearing from people - no matter what way.... I can only read so much or be in the hot tub so much! Or come for a visit or we can always go out for a cup of coffee or tea; a glass of wine or two; a funky drink! A walk along the sea wall - long as I take breaks!!

Roni

Numbers stunk.....

Hi everyone

Well - started out a busy week!

Monday, went to the Medical Day Care to get cross-matched for my transfusion - piece of cake! The nurse accessed the port and left it in - less chance of infection. Was driven to and from the appointment by a volunteer driver from the Canadian Cancer Society - she was a very nice and chatty lady!

Wednesday, the transfusion - talk about a long boring day...... over 4 hours and no one other than me under the age of 70! At least the nurses were fun and Meghan came for part of it which was great - even if she did spill my bag of Ritz.... And again, had a volunteer driver take me to the cancer clinic and then home again. By the time though I had finished getting the transfusion (2 pints), I was so tired - poor heart was saying "hey, you are only supposed to have 6 pints of blood in your system and you are making me now pump 8!".

Well - today was blood work and chemo day. My friend Cris came with me - she of needle fear!! Got the blood work done and then went to lunch - Swiss Chalet - was yummy! Went back to the Chemo Room and Andrea was my nurse again - but not with good news. First my blood work was late getting to them. And then being told that my numbers were low. Which ones I asked? My white count was 1.1 and my hemoglobin was 99. But my neuts were 0.03 - in my boots. She called Gary and he said that there would be no chemo for me today and to just come and see him as planned on the 29th and have chemo on the 1st. I am to be careful being around people, check my temperature and to ensure that I wash the hands well - which I do. And I have a bottle of Purel in my purse.

I had an appointment planned for 3 with a counsellor just to chat about stuff - and we went up to see if she would take me early - 1:20. She said no problem and had a great session with her and got some good ideas on how to reduce stress and how to sleep better. I am going to an innovative group for relaxation on the 28th at the clinic - Stress Reduction Series - so will let you know how that goes. And Cris was a sweetie and waited around for me even though I had planned for Meghan to come and get me!

So that was about it.... was a little disappointing not to get the chemo - but what can you do. Seems this round has not been good to my body but hoping it is kicking the crap out of the tumours!

I go on the 24th for the CT scan and will get the results when I see Gary on the 24th.

Ciao for now.... keep in touch!!

Roni

V8 has nothing on what I need....

Hi everyone!

Just once, I would love to go to a chemo and have the chemo and no issues around it!!!

Saw Dr. P on the 9th - he had been on holiday and was well rested!!! Meghan came with me as my second set of ears. I asked him that if this round of chemo didn't work - what would be next - more chemo was the reply, either via an IV or an oral drug. So, it is a wait and see. I also found out that I wasn't using my pain meds correctly. I would take them when the legs were painful. Nope - should be taking the two meds on an ongoing basis - never thought of that! Also spoke to him about "alternative" therapies. Not that they are against it - that is how chemo started - using a few trees. They do tell you to be careful - and I have to agree - with some of the "natural" products, you do need to check and see what is in etc - and amounts. So, for the moment, will stick with chemo!!! I took a list of questions and he answered them all. And also, included side effects. I did ask him about the white count boosters - again he is not wanting me to do them - expensive (some of them are $2500 a session and one is $6000 a month). And he feels that they won't make all that much of a difference. (think the threat of them made my white count go up!)

Now - chemo day!!! I had Trace again - he is so much fun (unfortunately, I didn't get a good pix of him today, as he was attending to a new patient). And he is a walking chemo expert. I sat in the chair and he said well..... my hemoglobin counts were very low - we are talking 79 - they were 120 around August 20, my white count was great - 1.6 - wahooo. So, looks like transfusion time. Trace called Dr. P and explained - the cold hands, going up the stairs and feeling tired, the white inside of eyelids and me feeling cold when everyone else is warm. We thought it might happen today - that would have been a hell of a chemo session! (transfusions take about 2.5 hours per pint and you get two). Gary told Trace for me to come and see him in the North Clinic - to sign the paperwork for the transfusion. Should be Monday or Tuesday - two pints, same place that draws my blood etc - I love my port. And also, Gary gave the ok to go ahead with the chemo. Which progressed as it should.

Claudia came with me today -we used to work together. Told her it would be boring, but think she may have learned something today - you always do at chemo. Each time I go, I learn something new. And we had a lot of fun - she took some good pictures! Should have told her that I want to be in her luggage on November when she goes on another cruise! Will sure miss her whenever I go back to work!

So, I have chemo on Sept 17th. CT on Sept 24 (will be using the Cancer Car for this). Dr. P on Sept 29 and then chemo on Oct 1 and ct 8. Any other appointments - well, will just have them and depending on what they are, will be reported here!

Well, now that you know all about the visit with Dr. P, lab work, the chemo session and the time for the blood transfusion, time for me to just add some words on me.

Today was, for a better choice of words - my 1 year anniversary of chemo. I started on Sept 10 last year. It is Shannon's birthday - she is 27 today and also CW & Leina's 3rd anniversary!!! I was going to dye my hair pink, but I could not find colouring anywhere.... oh, well, the thought was there!

For those of you who have been following the blog and those that are around me, you have noticed that I am always upbeat and happy etc. For the most part, I am, but for a lot of it, I am not - I tend to do this for others more than me. One can only keep so much inside and I guess I am in overflow mode! People ask if I am scared - hell yes - I am scared to death as to what is going to happen, when the counts go way down or the chemo doesn't work. I have no control of my life right now and that drives me crazy. What happens if this chemo doesn't work, what else is out there - and I try and think positive, but within me there is a voice that says what "she" thinks. I hate gut feelings. The tears have been coming a lot more often of late; sleep has been harder - mind won't shut off and it has nothing to do with the cancer. Meds help sometimes and sometimes not. Brian mentioned this and maybe I need to talk to someone, and I am so glad that he did. So I told Gary and he spoke with the counselor for the cancer agency. She called me this morning - while I am having a hot and wonderful, lavender bubble bath - complete with candles! There is just too much stuff going on and it is affecting me both emotionally and physicaly than I had expected - trying to always being upbeat when you feel crappy! I will see Maureen (counsellor) more than likely next Thursday. I have my will in place as well as the important one, the Living Will (and everyone should have this and their will in place). You feel scared, doing a living will, it is talking about reality, pulling the plug (for lack of better words) - and this will be hard for Brian to do as well as my kids.

I have noticed over the months, that less and less people make comments on the blog, I know you are reading them - I have a counter, and I have made it easier to comment as well. I told Brian the other day, I hear from no one.... and that hurts. I know that for a lot of people they don't know what to say – and you have your own life to lead. Hell, tell me how your garden is doing, your quilting, you kids or grand kids. Come over for a glass of wine or a cuppa coffee or tea. What I don't like, is when people saying they will come over and then don't show. Please don't do that - it hurts - I look forward to company. A good friend called me the other day, and I said thank you for calling, have not heard from anyone for almost 2 weeks – and she felt guilty – she didn't call as she thought I might be sleeping. Call - it doesn't matter if I am sleeping.... probably time for me to get up anyhow!

So, please, be there for me - and I know it sounds selfish,, but I need my friends. I need the physical contact wth people. Seems like everyone has fallen off the face of the earth. And I know, yes, you are all busy people, work and your friends and family. But I need you too!

So, call me and let's go for a coffee somewhere, a walk (on the level please!), glass of wine, talk about gardening and I know there are a few of you out there! (I will be planting a bunch of bulbs soon, subtle hint!)

I am very excited about the upcoming birth of my 4th grandchild - Madelynn Sierra! All the cute clothing that is out for girls. I don't understand why not equal amounts for little boys! Gammie has bought a few outfits (joys of clearance racks), We are all excited about her birth - maybe we should do a pool to guess her weight - long as she is smaller then what Ryan weighed at birth!!!

Patrick is in the last stages of signing up for the military - he is going Navy! His father and I are both very proud of him. Once all the paperwork has been approved, he will be sworn in, and I plan on being there for that - as is Brian, Rick (Patrick's Dad) and Chantal. Yes, it means he will be away - but hell, there is this lovely thing called the Internet and also good excuse to see the Maritimes!

I know that Shannon has been very busy with work and the fall campaign. She works too long if you ask me - but she is very passionate about her work and how it can help so many people!! Very proud for what she is doing. Hard to believe she is 27 now - I can remember (ok, only some of it - stop laughing Ardene and Rick!!) when she was born - having this tiny child in my arms to look after for life - amazing for sure.

Brian is now at work and has been for 2 weeks - guess they really start next week to work on the vehicles for VANOC - 2010 - wonder if he can score some good tickets - just kidding.

If I have made some of you cry - and I know there will be a few - I am glad - it means you are alive and feeling what I am talking about - and it is good to cry once in a while - cleans out the eyeballs and the soul!!

There you have it - good stuff - and it is all good. Means I am alive and surviving! And that is what is important!

Hugz to you all!

Roni

Pull Up...... Pull Up......

Hi there

So you are wondering - what is Pull up.... Pull up (other than a command on an aircraft that is not going up!). My numbers sucked today. Came close to not having the chemo. My white count was 0.6 - 0.5 is a no go for chemo. Red count was 93. Platelets were down to 129. So need to find out how to get the numbers up instead of down.

Andrea was my nurse today and she explained what the two options were. One was to talk to the oncologist and see if he would give the ok for the chemo at a reduced dosage. The other was to postpone chemo will next week. Dr. P is still on holidays. Dr. Johal is also on holidays. So, Dr. Theresa Chan was the oncologist who gave the go ahead for the chemo - 75% of the 75% dosage I was. And I won't go back to the original 100% or the 75%. So there was a lot of wait time between getting the req ok'd and signed by the doctor, the file coming back and the req going to pharmacy. Then I could take my anti-nausea meds. The req did make it to pharmacy - and I was hooked up to the pre-meds I have to take. And then we waited and waited - Andrea gave them a call and they couldn't find it - they were looking for the entire file. So, the file had to go down to pharmacy. Donna ran it next door and about 15 minutes later it arrived - guess better late the never. I only had the Gemcitabine today, the Cardoplatin is only on day 1 of the treatment not on day 8. Everything then went smoothly.

I go and see Dr. Tollas on Sept 9 (Gary is away still) and lab-work and chemo on September 10 and then again on September 17.

With my count being as low as it is, have to be careful of course of fevers - so far have been good. And of course trying to stay away from people who are sick.

Brian asked why they just don't pound me with antibiotics when my count goes down. And of course they don't like doing that - you may not have an infection just poor counts and if you start giving every patient who has low counts the drugs, they become immune to them. So it is a wait and see game.

Before we went to the Cancer Clinic, Brian, Meghan, Ryan and myself went to the Township of Langely Firehall - Doug is Brian's brother and is the Fire Chief. Ryan liked this, he got to go into two of the firetrucks and a rescue vehicle. Opened three of the hall doors - once he opened one, it was "open another one!!". He connected with Uncle Doug which was great. And we met Captain Brian Ulle - Ryan liked him. He turned on the lights on one of the trucks and got ladders down by pushing a button and then back up onto the truck again - Ryan said "ladder backing up" as it had the sound of a truck backing up. He got lots of stuff from Captain Brian - two hats, stickers, pencils, colouring books, tattoos, pins. He was a happy camper! And as we walked back to the cars, he took Uncle Doug's finger and held onto it - with his tight little grip and then gave Doug a hug goodbye.


Think that it about it....... more later....

Roni


Andrea and myself

Fire Training Officer Ryan!

Inside the fire rescue vehicle

Baby News

Hi there

Well, here is some fun news rather than medical news!!

I went this morning with Meghan, Corey and Ryan when they were to have the 3D Ultrasound. They wanted to make sure a healthy baby and of course to find out what they were having. Well, this baby was sleeping and planned on staying asleep as long as possible. Had their legs together and was holding one foot with the hand. Wasn't showing anything!

Well with some work from the technician - ie wake up the baby - Meghan and Corey's little boy Ryan - already knew what they were having. A baby sister! And so, they are having a little girl - and already she is cute!!! Ok, so I am a little biased,but she had chubby little cheeks and one heck of a heart beat - nice and fast. Could see her spine and ribs, and her toes and fingers - very awesome!

So, little Ryan will have his work cut out for him, protecting his little sister once she is a wee bit older.

We will all meet her in 10 weeks and everyone is so excited.

Roni (aka Gammie)